Hey Hey, this is stupid. haha

Hey guys.
So, this past Wednesday, my uncle, Ronnie, passed away... hummm diddly doo.
So, I have this wonderful photography business, Dollface Photos, www.dollfacephotos.tk, and I am so thrilled. My business cards came in, and I've got some FANTASTIC photos this past week. =)
I'll upload some of them later.

Cry myself into a sea

Wow. It's been one year today since Kerry and Carmen both died. Oh the anger! I still am so sad to think they both were preventable.
When I got the call for Carmen, I had already been in break-down mode over the news about Kerry.
I kind of feel like that emotion is real again. It hurts so bad, too. I just want this to be a dream sometimes when these things happen. =(

Angelique (Free Yourself)

Uhhm.

Webcam

I am trying to also install my webcam so that I can sing a song to you guys that i wrote last week for a very dear friend of mine... =) WOO! I have a whole book full of songs I've written, but it's the first worth singing... =)

Stay tuned for that!
I hopefully will have that up within the next week. I need to find the ukulele to accompany myself with. =)

Sami McAllister Photography

Well, Flickr pissed me off with a '200 photo max'
So, I dropped the 365 project... Left the pictures up there that I already have...
and NOW, I have my own photo business right from home.
www.dollfacephotos.tk
Yep... My loyal readers should look, and anyone passing through should check it out. I'm so happy....
by the way... this is post number 301 for me... =) WOOHOO! I've been going strong for over a year... =)

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Originally uploaded by samisimplicity

These two ladies.
Angelique, the blonde, and Brittany, the brunette, are life savers. Angelique is probably one of the most grounded, reasonable, and sweet people I have ever met. She is good at whatever she does, and she has a way of making people feel loved and deserving.
Brittany, on the other hand, is the sister my mom forgot about. She is so much like me, and we have had so many great memories. I got the chance to spend the last 2 weeks with her... and then she had to fly back home...
I always am missing her.

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Wow. I love what I do, and I do what I love...

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Originally uploaded by samisimplicity

Me... as naked as it gets... just make up... not even wearing a smile. Nobody sees me without make-up anymore... sad, I know

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=) Woohoo.

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Originally uploaded by samisimplicity

I decided to start a 365 project... =) lets see if i can stick to it. =) I've wanted to do it for a while... Finally, I'm starting!

Anyways

I'm Baaaaack.

I had a month from Hell in Kansas.
I started this blog back when I was 16. Now I have just turned 18, this Sunday.
So much has changed since this blog was started... and so much has stayed the same.
For one, I don't blog nearly as much as I'd like to anymore.
I was very confident when I started this blog... and I lost some of that.
I didn't know anyone in Tennessee when I started this blog... and now I have hundreds.
I was just a girl from out of town when I started this blog... now I play an important role in the community.
I had never felt so loved... and I had never felt so hated...
I'll be uploading photos of my vacation soon!

On the agenda this week: Brandon and Zaxby's tomorrow...
Brittany will be flying in to see me Saturday!

Kansas and Cancer

The two most depressing things right now for me.
Well, if you have been a loyal reader, you know I have always been surrounded by people with crisis.
If I love them, crisis is sure to follow.
So... why break the pattern now?
People I love in pensacola loosing their homes... 2 more cancer cases... and other issues I'm not getting into.
ANYWAY... I fugured it out...
God sends them to me. I keep a smile and a possitive outlook when it's somebody else.
A couple months after meeting each person... something insane happens.
OK. So.. Usually, I get this feeling that things are OK if they are... and I feel comfortable telling people that it will all be OK.
With one of these cancer cases... I can't bring myself to tell her she will overcome it... and it scares me... because the last person I got this feeling with was Carmen (Go back to August 09 in archives)

And i am stuck in Kansas... with nothing but dead fields around... and the peole I am spending time around are so negative here.
I'll escape with my step-mom tomorrow to visit my grea aunt, who is a bit more possitive...
Can't wait to be home...
(I'll be returning to TN on my birthday, July 18)

=) Summer

Summer Rally

Remember last June, when I went away for a week, and canoed, and meditated, and did a 12 hour silence...???
It's that time of year.
My clothes are IN the wash RIGHT now. =)
Leaving bright and early tomorrow.

See this?

Young Dancer 2
Originally uploaded by Psych101

I watched 8 year olds up on their toes like this just playing around back stage at the recital.... had to share!

Wow.

I almost forgot about this thing... I've been SO busy...
Anyway, I know I've talked about Lexie here before... and I got to watch her dance this weekend. She is so beautiful and talented!
They brought tears to my eyes during the ballet portion of the recital. AND FINALLY... I got a photo of us!

Her mommy got me a job working with these girls, and doing hair/make-up/costumes for them. I had SO much fun... but in the 72 hours I was helping, I got MAYBE 10 hours of sleep... and that's pushing it.

I'd do it again in a heart beat!

♥ 277 //

You are currently reading blog post 277 of this blog. I am SO close to 300. I can't wait. If I can remember, I will try and post my longest post EVER for 300. hehe
Anyway... today was long. Tomorrow is my last official day of school. After that, exams, and we're out!
I can't stand how my mom and dad act sometimes... I mean, grow up. Mom always tells me that I 'CHOOSE to let people influence' my day... and dad decides not to go to walmart with her because he needs time, and she gets all bitchy for the day... and then dad is so depressed when we are not financially wonderful, that he sits and does nothing... which adds to the instability of the financial situation... get it?

♥ kindra //

She's back. We cranked the lawn mower. Yeah, you're jealous. We are eating popcorn, candy, drinking unhealthy drinks, and she is eating slim jims... yeah... this will be a good night.

Colbie Caillat - Fallin' For You (Official Video)

I think this basically sums up my situation... but he's not that annoying... and he's definately more attractive... <3 lalala

why?

Wow. I really am falling for this guy.
Here's the thing though... I don't want to fall for him... wasn't exactly who I felt like I wanted to be with... and I feel like I am only 17... what do I know about love?
I don't want him to know I am falling for him either... but ugh. He's my first thought in the morning, and last thought at night. I get all giddy and bubbly when I think of him...
and I promised myself not to fall for anyone for a while...
WHY OH WHY?

So busy...

Originally uploaded by Suus Wansink

I feel like I do so much... and get left in the pouring rain. I feel like I put my heart into everything I do, and I do it to the fullest if I say I will... and what do I get out of it? A sore shoulder, a broken heart, and a punch in my self esteems gut. =(

The very ones who I thought I could trust to stay with me, seemed to have flown out my window, and they opened it by themselves...
This time, I didn't push them away... and I am left exhausted... and laying here... wondering what to do next!

Wow.

I haven't been on here in a while.
A LOT has happened. I broke a finger... =/
I went on a 6 mile hike in the Smoky Mt. National Park
I have been 2 weeks without seeing Chickadee
and 2 weeks without seeing Jake
We signed yearbooks
I cried
My "Loyal Reader" has not been posting
Wonder if all is well with him/her?

Hello lovely people

Sooo... I have had a few requests to give shout outs to certain blogs. I would like to say that I am not a major shouter-outer... but if you would like me to give a shout out in the next week or so, comment on this post with a LINK to your blog that you want promoted... NO personal websites. NO spam.

I will check out your blog, and decide whether it's worth the shout out or not.

My Mom

Dear Mom,
I know we have our differences. I know we argue a lot, and I am not always the ideal daughter... but even in that, you recognize the few ideal traits I have, and look at me with those.
I know I can be a pain at times, and I know sometimes you probably don't want to deal with me... but you do.
Even though we can be at each other's throats for days at a time, I still look at you, and have a big relief in my heart when I am reminded that our relationship is unique.
Most girls run and tell their best friend about the boy she met. Most girls run and talk to their best friend when they have a broken heart. And usually, most girls would sneak past their mom to go out with their best friend at night...
I am fortunate enough to say that you ARE my best friend in that respect, and I love that I can trust you that much.
Happy Mothers Day Mommy!!!

To all my moms

Dear Moms.
It's Mothers Day.
Of course I came from MY mommy, but I have picked up moms throughout the years. I love you ladies dearly. You all do a lot for me.
Sometimes I can feel lonely, useless, and insecure. Sometimes I can feel down, and in trouble. Sometimes I can feel like there is no pain like that that I am feeling... But always, one of you comes through for me.
I have felt lonely, forgotten, neglected, and insecure... and each time those little thoughts come into play, you tackle them down, and make me feel needed and loved.
I love you guys!

here.

She sits here
watching everyone
every day she grows
and she loves them more
but she simply watches
like her favorite show
and once in a while
they invite her on as a guest
but by the next episode
she has been forgotten
and nobody remembers her
nobody knows her love
and she weeps in the shadow
but is not noticed once
she is nobody's first thought
and nobody's last
but she loved them all
more than anyone loved them

Feeling Groovy

I am sitting in school right now.
The catch: We have no school today.
I am using a teachers computer to broadcast this blog.
I am being held by a 6 year old and a 4 year old.
It's cold.
I have a small space heater behind this desk.
They are torturing me with "Bolt"
The halls are empty. Nobody in sight.
Nobody in any classrooms.

=)